There's a real emotional shift happening in this one, "melt" starts off almost destructive, melting down a ring, melting dreams away, and by the end it becomes something closer to release, grief melting instead of holding on. That's such a powerful turn. The line "let the heat cover my grief till" does a lot of quiet work too. Really moving piece.
Thanks for visiting. All comments will be reviewed by me before they go live. If you are anonymous, please choose a consistent handle to sign your words with. I appreciate your understanding that my comment space is not a free speech zone for personal attacks or sales pitches.
The repeated "melt" works well in such a short form, and the gold ring is a strong image for grief. A moving cinquain.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Diana!
DeleteOuch, that's heavy
ReplyDeleteYeah. I was channeling my divorce (from 2011)...
DeleteThere's a real emotional shift happening in this one, "melt" starts off almost destructive, melting down a ring, melting dreams away, and by the end it becomes something closer to release, grief melting instead of holding on. That's such a powerful turn. The line "let the heat cover my grief till" does a lot of quiet work too. Really moving piece.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much!
DeleteThat gave me the sad, it starts out not so grief driven and then it hits you.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your perspective, Mary!
DeleteWow.. This is beautifully crafted
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
DeletePaula, you really took melt from melting to melted! Bravo!
ReplyDeleteWow, that's pretty cool what you did with "melt down". Well done.
ReplyDeleteWow, that's really cool what you did with "melt down". Well done.
ReplyDeleteVery powerful 🙌
ReplyDeleteA moving piece, Paula. 'Let the heat cover my grief till
ReplyDeleteit melts'
So sad. Very moving.
ReplyDeleteOooh! This hits hard.
ReplyDeletehi, Paula❣️
ReplyDeleteJust wanna let you know that this week's W3, hosted by our beloved Destiny, is live until Monday, October 12:
https://skepticskaddish.com/2026/10/07/w3-prompt-232-weave-written-weekly/
Much love,
David
SkepticsKaddish.com
hi, Paula❣️
ReplyDeleteJust wanna let you know that this week's W3, hosted by our beloved Punam, is now live:
W3
Much love,
David
SkepticsKaddish.com